A Beautiful Bride and Person - gonna miss her!

I wrote this post very late at night on June 21st ... but after I lost it all, I was too exhausted to finish it so I saved it and just now finished editing it.

Sometimes I blog to share something with you or to update you all with something. Other times I blog to get my feelings out, to journal my experience and express all the thoughts in my head ... tonight is one of those nights. I actually blogged all this on Tuesday night, and then hit save and lost it all so I tried to remember everything I wrote to share it again. I want to share my thoughts and feelings and experiences from Tuesday because I want to have a record of it (and typing it on my blog is easier than writing it in my journal). :)

I had the opportunity to attend the wedding and reception for Karianna. Karianna came into our lives a little over 4 years ago. It was Feb of 2007 and Jess had just turned 2. Steve met Karianna at Wal-Mart when he bumped into her dad (who was a college drumline buddy). He was immediately impressed with the 15 almost 16 year old girl and told me she would be perfect for my assistant. I hired her a month or so later and ... she's been a true blessing in our lives. At first, she worked a few days a week after school plus babysat one night every weekend. She did mostly housework and helped with the kids and did some basic routine tasks in my office. But as my business grew, she took on more and more in the office and around the house too. She's done everything from clean toilets, help cook dinner, babysit the kids, do homework, drive carpool, run my office while I've been gone, watched my kids while we were out of town, go on vacations with us and even ventured on a plane for the first time (and she was by herself!) to help me at one of my tradeshows.


In the past 4 years, she has become such a big part of our family. Taylor and Jessica don't remember her not being part of our family. She's seen me cry, laugh, scream, ... she has seen it all. She has probably spent more waking hours at my house than at her own some weeks. :)

I was so blessed to be able to go to her wedding at the Draper Temple. It was a beautiful ceremony. At the last minute, I asked my new assistant Melissa to bring my girls to the temple when the ceremony ended so they could see Karianna and Mike come out of the temple. As we waited for her to come out, I felt such a gratitude for the example Karianna has set for my girls. They have so many cherished memories - big memories and the every day moments that they will always remember. She has been like a big sister to them and they truly love her. But the overwhelming feeling for me was gratitude for her example. She is so strong and kind and just good. She has taught me so much and although sometimes she is like a daughter to me, more often she is like a sister to me too, a true friend. She is one of those people who just radiates goodness.

As we waitedk, it touched my heart to see how excited the girls were to see her. When Karianna and Mike came out, she went to her dad and gave him a big hug. As their hug broke up, my girls converged on her. I took a picture of Alyssa and Karianna and then as I started to take one of Tay and Karianna, Jess wrapped her arms around my legs and literally just collapsed against me crying. I hadn't seen her get hurt, so I had no idea what was wrong. As I bent down and cuddled her against me to find out was wrong, she sobbed, "I'm gonna miss her." What could I say to her? Me too... and the tears streamed down my face - thank goodness for big sunglasses! :) I finally got her consoled and she gave Karianna a hug with big tears in her eyes. But when I asked her if she wanted to give Mike a hug, she told me NO! The girls really love Mike, but there is definitely a sense of jealousy toward him.

The week before the wedding, Taylor was very concerned about the fact that Karianna won't be at Alyssa's and Taylor's birthday parties. And while I was at the reception, it dawned on me that Tay doesn't remember when Karianna wasn't there. Karianna has helped with their parties every year since she started working for me. And Jess and Taylor were young enough when Karianna came to work for me, that they don't remember her ever not being at our house 4-6 days a week. They don't remember our previous assistants/babysitters being here in our home (they know them because we see them from time to time, but they don't remember them being here).

At the reception, all three girls helped. Alyssa was so proud to help at the refreshments bar ... she helped stock things and serve ice cream. Because Karianna trusted her do that made Alyssa feel so grown up and important, another way that Karianna shows her love for my girls. She knows how to make them feel special, appreciated and involved. Taylor and Jessica helped clear tables when people were done with their dishes. Jessica did a great job, but Taylor to my surprise wasn't very interested in helping (she usually likes to help). Karinna and I actually joked last week that Taylor would be so on-top of it that as people took the last spoonful of icecream from their bowl she'd take the empty bowl away from them before they could put the spoon down. :) She did help some, but she mostly sat and studied the pictures of Karianna on the video and around the room, as if she was trying to soak in every bit of her that she could. She signed Karianna & Mike's scrapbook multiple times (and wanted to sign every page, but I told her that wasn't necessary) so Karianna won't forget her. And she came to me several times and told me she wished Karianna didn't have to go away. I explained we'll still see her, but she knows it will be different. When we pulled into the garage tonight, she broke into quiet little sobs. When I finally got her to tell me what was wrong, she said that she missed Karianna already and was sad she wasn't going to be able to give Karianna pictures that she draws anymore. She has drawn one of Karianna and Mike that she wants to give her. I reassured her we'd still see her some and we'd make sure she gets the picture. (Karianna is working for me a week in July - so it won't be too long until she's back in my office again - although temporarily).


Kariannaa is an amazing person that I am so grateful and blessed to have had in my life, my home and as a part of my family. She has impacted us in ways she will never truly understand and my girls look forward to the day when she has kids and they are old enough to babysit for them. Soem of the things I love about Karianna ... she loves her family so much and it shows constantly. She loves others and loves serving. She volunteers whenever she can, even taking a trip to Mexico to work in some orphanages. Her faith is unwaivering. Even as a teenager, she just seemed to understand who she is, a daughter of God with an amazing potential. Things that should matter to her, matter. Many of the petty drama of high school was never a part of her life. Her strength, her hope and her positive attitude inspire me constantly.. But I'd leave so much out if I didn't mention her work ethic. Karianna never expected things or acted like she deserved things. She just works hard for everything - regardless what is asked of her - and is grateful for the blessings that come. She truly taught me to be more grateful... even in the face of trials.

Congrats to Mike & Karianna! We love you both and look forward to gaining Mike as part of our "family" - not losing Karianna. We hope that they will both be a part of our lives forever.

Pics to come ...